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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23538073">His.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrismaticDelight/pseuds/PrismaticDelight'>PrismaticDelight</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Original Work, The Amberwood Series</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Drabble, I might get rid of this later..., a mess, please bear with me., what is this</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 07:13:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>399</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23538073</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrismaticDelight/pseuds/PrismaticDelight</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>I'm... not really sure. I was in a mood and this came out- I don't know how to explain it???? So, I guess, don't read into this too deeply or... something. ????????? Just know that it's a "short" for Astrid Cain-</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>His.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Just once, I want you to look at me.<br/>Truly, deeply, unconditionally, unfathomably look at me.<br/><em>Study me</em>.<br/>Cut me open, if you must.<br/>Break every bone and meld it back together.<br/>Reshape me from the clay of Mother<br/>and the ashes of Father.</p><p>Tell me what you see.<br/>Tell me what you find.<br/>Is it just as I feared?<br/>Am I hollow?<br/>Am I incapable of being anything more?<br/>Am I aimless?</p><p>Does what you see please you?<br/>Or do you scorn me?<br/>Will you throw my remains in the hearth?<br/>Will you drag me Under? <br/>If I tried to climb, would you stop me?<br/>Of course, you would.<em> You always do.</em><br/>Because that place isn’t meant for me.<br/>Yet somehow, despite us being the same, it’s meant for <em>you</em>.<br/>It’s meant for the people at our shoes.<br/><br/></p><p>But not me.</p><p>Never me.</p><p>
  <em>It will never be me.</em>
</p><p>You say, in time, perhaps that will change.<br/>Yet, no matter how cruel, or selfish, or unbridled I am, it is <br/>always<br/>no.</p><p>So, tell me. Where do I go? What is my purpose?<br/>If I have none, then why exist?<br/>Because I have a purpose? Then what is it?<br/>If it’s not here, nor there, nor up, nor below…<br/>then where? How can I find it? Will I? Can I?</p><p>…Maybe I’m blind. Yes.<br/>The Sightless cannot see their abyss.<br/>They cannot see what creates them and makes them whole.<br/>They cannot see where they belong or where to go.<br/>…I cannot.<br/>Because, in the end, I do not want to.</p><p>Not anymore.</p><p>It grants me nothing.<br/>It leaves me empty.</p><p>Maybe I’ve always been empty.</p><p>But that has been an emptiness of my own Creation.<br/>An emptiness I can Control.<br/>From the clay of Mother, and ashes of Father,<br/>my place is somewhere I cannot yet reach.</p><p>I cannot see nor smell. <br/>I know not what it feels like, either.</p><p>But, somehow, I know what awaits me is better than this.<br/>It is… purposeful.</p><p>It is a place that accepts even me and all my Sightless, empty ways.</p><p>So, if being Sightless grants me such a place, then my Creation is of benefit to me.<br/>And only me.</p><p>Just once, I want you to look at me.<br/>I want you to watch me.<br/>I want you to <em>witness</em> me.</p><p>From the clay of Mother, and ashes of Father.</p>
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